Friends, Enemies, and Internet Losers: I have returned.

Sunday Wrap-Up: October 18, 2009

 

THE PIECE AS ORIGINALLY SCRIPTED…

Friends, enemies, and Internet losers, I have returned. Hello. My name is Baron S. Cameron and this is “Sunday Wrap-Up.”

Right off the bat…

Was it a hoax? I am certainly starting to think so. The Sherriff’s department says that charges will be laid. In fact, they may have already. I haven’t turned on my TV today. Want to know why? Because I am tired of hearing about the fucking “Balloon Boy.” Especially considering that he should be more appropriately named, “The Boy in the Box.”

Now you may ask why a father would do such a thing… Really? No, really? Have we learned nothing from that dark March day in 1983. March 12, 1983, the day when a publicity seeking loner named John David Stutts shot and killed Buckwheat as he left 30 Rock? People will do almost anything for their 15 minutes of fame… clock’s ticking weirdo.

Speaking of fame…

Can we put as a condition of their divorce that neither Jon, nor Kate, ever appear on TV again? I am getting real tired of these two. Can they just move over and let another freak in their place? You were famous for doing a show that exploited your drug addled, infertile womb and now you don’t have the show anymore. Get off TV. Jon, grow the fuck up. And Kate, find a hairstylist that doesn’t walk with a white cane.

Other than that, I hope you had a good week. I hope next week is good for you, and I should probably see you again next Sunday.

Bye.

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